My[23f] boyfriend [24m] gained 70lbs and I've lost all attraction to him. He refuses to do anything about it

When we began dating about 3 years ago he was fit, he worked out a lot and competed in sports. He unfortunately suffered an injury that left him unable to work out for about 7 months. During this time he reverted back into the habits he had when he was a young teenager (he was overweight then) and ate a lot of bad food. He also began drinking more and he still drinks quite a lot now, which we are trying to work on. He has put on about 70lbs in our relationship from about 170 to 240lbs at 5'11.

I have lost all attraction to him, in fact I am somewhat repulsed by him physically. I try not to make this clear to him but he knows. I always refuse sex and we haven't had any sexual contact in about 6 months. I still enjoy his company but his weight is beginning to really bother me. He does go through periods of trying to lose it but it always comes back because of his terrible diet.

Last month he switched from beer to vodka and diet coke and he has lost 5lbs. He could have lost a lot more if he actually tried. He also goes out to eat way too much and gets takeaway instead of cooking.

He has body image issues and sometimes when he is feeling guilty he throws up after eating, he has been doing this since he was 12 apparently and I think it's been more frequent recently. I've been trying to encourage him towards healthier options so he doesn't feel guilty and he will eat them if i make them but otherwise he won't.

I know he's not happy but I struggle to feel the same connection to him because I've lost the sexual attraction.. I know that's shallow.

I just want things to go back to how they were for the first year we were together. He makes so many promises to lose weight but it doesn't happen. I also made a really nasty comment about his weight once in an argument and now he just shuts down every time I try and talk about it. He hides a lot of things from me and it's difficult to get him to open up.

What should I do?

Tldr; boyfriend gained 70lbs in our relationship and I have lost all attraction. He might be depressed but he won't open up to me. Our connection is fading but I still want to salvage this relationship if possible.

Submitted September 04, 2019 at 12:16PM by Zzz95x https://ift.tt/30WKHMS