I love my fiancé [25M], I love our life and our son, but he has destroyed every last shred of trust in him.

This isn’t an update - however I did previously post about an issue and this is related.

I posted about a recent night out my fiancé was on - where he spent an hour with a girl roaming for a taxi - well, it turns out he kissed her.

Just before Christmas, my fiancé got into a fight with one of his friends - who immediately messaged me to tell me my fiancé had kissed the girl on the night out. I asked if this was true. I knew who she was so messaged her on Facebook and confronted my fiancé. He lied and said nothing happened. A few hours later his friend responded - yes he wasn’t lying, my fiancé had told him last night he kissed her. Finally, my fiancé broke down and told me the truth. A few hours after that she responded on Facebook and confirmed - one kiss, a peck.

But I’m just heartbroken. I agreed to try and work through it for the sake of our son, and I think I just wanted to get through the holidays.

But now the dust has settled I am not so sure.

He lied to me, disrespected me to his friends, kissed someone else, treated me like crap.

Since this came out he has desperately been trying to make amends. He says on the night it happened he was scared to tell me in case he lost me, then the lies spiralled and he kept panicking.

But what good does that do me? I want a man who can at least be honest when he fucks up. This could have been forgivable, in my opinion, if he’d been honest. But he lied to save his own skin.

He used my own words as justification for lying. A friend of ours recently kissed a girl behind his girlfriends back, and got super upset about it. I think I said something along the lines of ‘well if he’s never going to do it again, maybe it would be best not to tell her and he can deal with the guilt himself’. It was an off-the-cuff remark which I barely meant, I think I might’ve been playing on my phone and not really even listening when I said it. Which apparently meant that if he kissed someone he has to lie about it so I don’t find out.

I’m just tired, I’m done. I love him, and I love our son. I wanted us to work, but now I just think he’s a liar and a cheat. Is there ANY possibility of hope for this? Is there a way for someone to learn how to grow up/be more of a man (I mean that in a grown-up sense rather than a manly man sense) ? Therapy or something? He has had an extremely rough childhood and does not have good role models. Does that make him doomed to repeat his dads mistakes? If he wanted to prove himself what’s the minimum I should expect?

In my heart I want it to work, but my head thinks I’d be setting myself up for a fail further down the line.

TL;DR fiancé kissed someone, is it the end.

Submitted January 02, 2019 at 07:19AM by throwitaway98125 http://bit.ly/2s80c4P